A tourist visiting Miami walked into a pet shop and was looking at the animals on display.

While he was there, a police officer walked in and said to the shopkeeper, "I'll take a Patrol monkey, please." The shopkeeper nodded, went over to a cage at the side of the shop and took out a monkey. He fit it with a collar and leash, handed it to the officer saying, "That'll be $1,000." The officer paid and walked out with his monkey.

Startled, the tourist went over to the shopkeeper and said, "That was a very expensive monkey. Most of them are only a few hundred dollars. Why did it cost so much?" The shopkeeper answered, "Ah, that monkey can fire expert with all small arms, write 20 tickets a month, and is certified in Small Unit Tactics--- well worth the money!

The tourist looked at the monkey in another cage. "That one's even more expensive! $10,000! What does it do?" "Oh, that one's a POST certified Sergeants Patrol monkey; it can instruct other monkeys in Basic Firearms Skills, Counter Terrorism, Training, Physical Training, Small Unit Tactics and investigative techniques, and even type. All the really useful stuff," said the shopkeeper.

The tourist looked around for a little longer and saw a third monkey in a large cage of its own. The price tag around its neck read $70,000. He gasped to the shopkeeper, "That one costs more than all the others put together! What on earth does it do?" The shopkeeper replied, "Well, I haven't actually seen it do anything, but it says it's a lieutenant."